Illusive Happiness

I just finished Anne Giardini's book "The Sad Truth About Happiness". It had some great moments but overall I thought it lacked fluidity. The author would break out in beautiful, scensory paragraphs that didn't fit into where the story was at or where I thought the mood was going.

Having said all that, the novel made me think. At the end of the book, after the main character has spent a fair amount of time alone, she comes up with this thought, " I am no longer in pursuit of happiness. As I stand here at my front door, key in hand, I think it is just possible that happiness, at least for now, today, this hour, may be in pursuit of me." Aaah, she has arrived.

I'm wondering if instead of what Freud said, (human sexual drive/instinct is stronger than even our survival instinct)-that the strongest drive in humans is our pursuit of happiness. Perhaps we have evolved to this or maybe this is a path that is inherent in the North American culture only.

I try so hard to make all the right choices in life and I have made many. I have all the ingredients in my life that should make happiness. I have someone (s) to love, I have something to do, and I have something to look forward to. I have to admit that I'm not always happy and I'm tired of trying so hard.

I'm going to quit the pursuit. And when happiness hits me, I'm going to suck up that moment and then breathe it out again. Wish me luck or better yet, wish me happiness.